There has been prevalent cases of rape, which are raising concerns and many are blaming the lack of education of the male child as the root cause. In as much as I agree that is part of the problem, I think there are other perspectives.
I am a man of like passion and I feel what many have felt or are feeling. I made a self-discovery sometimes ago that those feelings are real and I can go any length to satisfy them if not controlled.
Medically, it’s okay to feel attracted towards the opposite sex. The struggle is how to keep that feelings within the boundary. Obviously, avoiding the triggers to those extreme feelings would help but is there something that can complement that?
The story was told of a blind man in the Bible whose eyes were opened. He was sincere, and said to Jesus, he can see but he saw men as trees. Jesus touched him the second time and he confirmed he can see clearly. I need to change something and that is, how I see my fellow ladies. If I see ladies as trees, I will only think of what I can get from them. My thoughts will be occupied by my selfish desires and lusts. If I see them clearly, I will think of what I can give.
As Fela Durotoye once said, “a man can be a hunter or Gardener”; dear men, let’s go beyond hunting and become Gardeners. The woman has lots of potential, let us help them bring them out. When we hunt, we kill and consume. When we nurture, we prepare the ground for more fruits.
I pray we see ladies who they truly are. One of my prayers always is, “God, take me to that point where I can truly see your image in everyone, irrespective of race, gender, class, religion, ethnicity”. Unless, we see clearly, we would keep hunting our ladies. May God help us all, Amen.
– Paul Onoja writes from Kogi state.