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This short article is personal to me because even though it is connected to Oluwasegun Aberoran, popularly known as “Sege Dudu” the former Personal Assistant to Sen. Dino Melaye who resigned his appointment with the Kogi West Senator some weeks ago over issues I would highlight here; I find it as a message for many youths across Nigeria.
Let us go into this journey together.
come with me.
Do you remember Sege Dudu? He was the aide to Senator Dino Melaye that was given a 1987 Honda Accord in the affluence of the fleets of ground moving machines of exotic candor Dino has as cars, with many vintage cars also parked in his compound, driven by nobody.
Sege-Dudu is a representation of many Nigerian youths, especially those in the political corridors. Those who serve their political mentors diligently but have crumbs and dejected treatments given to them with their lives hanging in the balance.
Do you know the pain one goes through to know that your boss dolls out cash of about 250k per night to a single prostitute but you as a worker under his nose may request for a 100k to solve a nagging family problem, only to be greeted by complaints of “no money”? At best, the pay you salary advance. This may even sound entitled, let us move on.
Do you know how many principal aides of many politicians are currently trekking, jumping from one bikes to the other but the politicians they serve, buy cars for others on a daily basis, gift their paraphernalia of girlfriends of different imports, impress different people with gifts whilst ignoring their closet-servants. Their support system. Those who have their secrets on the chests. Those who know when they sleep and wake.
This is a Nigerian tragedy. Many people, ordinary citizens including politicians, treat their drivers, cooks, domestic aides, Police attaché, etc like dejected vermins but they sleep and wake up in the hands of these people.
You would see that they have served them for many years but have only mediocre sentiments as achievements. For some reasons, psychologically, they keep them under this torture to demand loyalty through sufferings. Most of these politicians who think this way always think when they empower their boys “qualitatively” they would grow more than them and desert them. Hence, they keep holding the destinies of others down their spine because of their own insecurities.
Where is service? Where is the true mentorship?
It is the sad and untold story of many workers under Nigerian bosses. They hide it with the smokescreen of “open philanthropy” which is posted on the media.
Even the Bible admonishes that every man should start the good he does, from his home. Little wonder, we see many men who are celebrated by others outside but hated by their own children at home.
Sege Dudu has been with Senator Dino Melaye for more than 3 and half years since he became senator, he resigned his appointment over negligence to his welfare, non-payment of his salaries and his destiny of continuous hijack.
I would write from experiences of others.
I remember a tale a friend told me about his boss who sat on his progress for a long time. He had learnt all he could and have done exceptionally well in combining what he learned from his boss and his own independent self development. When he tried moving abroad for a job he filled in for, recommendation letter was requested from his boss. The man wrote that he was unprepared.
This friend was broken. He had planned his own life and designed it to go the way he wanted. This man, stopped it.
It would later appear that his boss stopped him because of the commendation his heard about this my friend from his own friends. Particularly, someone even mentioned that he would be better than his boss in the trade.
He was stopped. Stopped elevation because a boss somewhere didn’t want someone who learned under him to grow more than himself.
I know many people who without access that could help others develop more than themselves. I know many people who would withhold contacts and prevent others from enjoying what they are enjoying because they think they can monopolize success.
I know many people who could have suggested a thing or two to others to introduce breakthrough into their lives but would rather not do so because of their insecurities.
Such is the wickedness of man.
Who then have you entrusted your destiny under?
In my own case, I have met someone who told me that until they are elevated before they would push for my own elevation. By implication, if they remained where they were, I would have to remain there because my own growth was subject to their own growth. That was a big sign of what was to come in the future.
It broke every trust I had for that person to fight for my elevation behind me. Many people are like that.
Between two years of trying my hands on mentorship, I can count 11 persons I have impacted directly with a portion of my skills, about 6 young women and 5 young men. After I see that they have learnt what they came to me for, I do not like to keep them close for the complex of being called “mentor. I allow them go into upgrade of friendship. Why do I do so? It is some sort of freedom I grant them. I do not think I have the capacity to affect every area of their lives. If I am done with the pressing part, why keep them under me to serve me complex? Why hold them stiff when others with a higher learning can do better?
This mentality is why many African parents never understand when their children become adults and are qualified to make decisions for themselves.
Like Sege-Dudu, how long would you keep your destiny under someone who does not want you to grow beyond their own expectations?
How long do you keep oscillating around self pity without taking a walk when you’re serving under anyone without humanity and love?
How long would you keep your life under the perpetual injunction of a narcissistic persona who like to command and control his workers who are subjected to emotional penury and financial slavery?
Imagine the age of Sege-Dudu given a 1987 Honda Accord, when me, under 30, my first car is a 2002 model. He works with a Senator as a Personal Assistant, a man who gulps in over 13.5M monthly as allowance, minus miscellaneous that is not disclosed.
How can Sege-Dudu reconcile his pride with what he sees with me, when we hang out together?
Why do these men not even see that the quality of life people around them are living is a reflection of their own taste, class and quality of mind?
As for me, this year, I walked away from that person who told me until they are promoted before they can agitate for mine. I walked away from every of the consequences and my life is better for it- in the hands of God.
Like Sege Dudu, he walked away from slavery into pomp and stardom. Two weeks after walking away, he is now the Senior Special Assistant to The Kogi State Government on Mobilisation, Kogi West.
His official vehicle is a 2018 Ford Hilux, utility vehicle. Best of all, he is being celebrated for taking his own destiny into his hands.
Friends, life would not give you anything because anyone likes you, you will have to dip your hands into it to make demands. You will have to know that your destiny is in your own hands. Before you entrust it to anyone, check the quality of their minds.
When I chose political mentorship, I looked into Chief Edward Onoja, he did not struggle for it with authority. He took my loyalty with the content of his character. Check the quality of lives of those around him, I mean those who know what they are also doing, it comes with taste and class.
Let us go to sleep with God, holding our destinies while we choose those we entrust our trust in, with sense.
Kogi West, congratulations. You have made a statement with 2019.
– Promise Emmanuel (Kogi Rebel)
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